(in response to the November Notes Writing Challenge as hosted by A Reading Writer and Heartstring Eulogies)
I played the last note and she looked at me with that smile.
“Play it again,” she insisted.
“Maybe later,” I answered as I set my guitar down.
I had more important things to do with my hands, my mouth. She sat on my bed wearing my tshirt and I needed her kiss more than I needed the air that I breathed.
“We have a problem baby,” I said as I stood looking down at her with a stern frown.
“We do?” She gazed up at me, a little bit nervous and uncertain.
We were still so new, didn’t know each other well enough yet for her to know I was teasing. I nodded, played it up. “A big problem,” I confirmed then had to bite back a groan as she bit her lip. I tugged at the hem of the tshirt. “You stole my tshirt,” I said with a growl.
“Hmmm.” A teasing smile touched those lips I wanted so bad. “I guess I better give it back then.”
What I wouldn’t give to have her sitting beside me, wearing my tshirts again. Instead, I’m alone staring at a sheet of paper wondering what I can write so she’ll open her heart to me, let me in. I’m wondering if it’s all too late, am I grasping at straws, holding air? I put my pen to the paper …
Day five and I’m sitting here just thinking about you, about the good times we had together. I’m wishing we were making new memories instead of living these separate lives. I’m wishing you’d give me the chance to make amends. I’m wishing I could be what ever you need me to be.
Just for today, I’m letting melancholy win, feeling sad that you’re not here. I’ll do better tomorrow baby. For today, I need ice cream so you’re getting it too. Rocky road … too obvious?