Pain

Today’s Daily Prompt: Desert

Feels like forever I’ve been standing here waiting for her.

The view out the window doesn’t change much, the lake, the trees. The leaves fell off the trees recently so I guess winter is coming. Perfect! I look forward to freezing my ass off in this ‘facility’.

Joel joins me, looking out the window. At least I’m not alone.

“Any luck?” he asks hopefully.

I don’t know why he’s asking again. Well I do know. He’s desperate, the same as me. The future stretched before me, no hope in sight. Just an endless expanse, a desert without an oasis.

“Not since …” I trail off, I can’t even say it.  I lift a hand to my head, rub my temple where there’s a dull throb.

“The pills?” Joel nods. He clasps my shoulder, says, “I’m sorry man.

I nod, my throat wont let me speak, it’s crowded with panic that I struggle to swallow down.

The pills, the little blue pills, keeping me chained to this reality. Just like in the movie, The Matrix. Interesting. Maybe the Blands had a sense of humour. What I wouldn’t give for a little red pill, to be free, just one last time.

If I was, what would I do? Would I use that last chance to engineer my and Joel’s escape? Or would I use it to see her, touch her, one last time? To imprint the feel of her skin, so soft. The scent of her hair, a light citrus aroma. Tangle my fingers in the silky strands, wrap them around my hands as I taste her lips. One last time.

Fuck the pills I decide. I can do this. I can do this because I know she’s there, waiting for me. Fuck them and their game.

True or False Alex: We control you with this little blue pill.

False fuckers! You think you control me. You think your game answered all the questions, gave you all the power.

They seriously underestimated me, underestimated how badly I want her.

I close my eyes, try to focus on that feeling that lets me roam but instead find myself trapped in that desert, sand stretches before me. I pick a direction and start walking, as empty and barren as it seems, there is life here somewhere, I can feel it.

Every step hurts, the pain like metal spikes in my brain. I don’t care. I start to sing.

“Pain, I can’t get enough.”

 

 

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